Ah nuts!

I’ve probably (definitely) paranoid when it comes to my child. (And everything else for matter, now that you mention it.)
Last night as I put my angelic little man to bed, having said our prayers, blessed everything in sight and said our usual “I love you with all my heart, see you in the morning and I’ll be close by” I stood up to leave his room.
Joseph being in highspirited mode, decided to continue playing with his current favourite book ‘Calm Down Boris’.
In a faux American accent he declared “Am gunna kick you in the nuts”
I nearly choked. I know he now has the influence of nursery, but I’m in denial enough that my son has nuts in the first place ( a winky yes, or some equally inoffensive term) with any reference to him or anyone else kicking them.
“What did you say?” I chirped and he replied “Nothing”.
“Where did you hear that expression?” I asked.
“Scotland,” was his reply. Now I know that his Scottish pseudo cousins would never use such language and considering it is five months since we last saw them and he only just came out with I know that was a fib.

I tossed and turned through the night about my boy’s foul language and that he was now being influenced by people outside my control and got reall quite upset.

This morning as we dressed for school (to a chorus of ‘Poor poor Joseph, what you gonna do? Sit up at a table and do a smelly poo”) I asked him to repeat what he said last night
“Am gonna kick your butt” he replied, and while butt isn’t ideal, it’s less offensive that nuts. So perhaps I can rest assure that the gutter mouth hasn’t started ... yet.