Friday, August 14, 2009

Big Girls Do Cry...

A report released this week has revealed that women over the age of 26 (that would be be then) cry for an average of two hours and 14 minutes a week.
Apparantly we cry babies are most likely to get blubbing over a soppy film, a falling out with a partner, a bereavement, feeling tired or hearing someone else’s bad news.
Interestingly the survey found that the only age group which cries more than us grown ups are babies under the age of two.
Yes, on average, women over the age of 26 shed more tears than the average pre-schooler having their requisite 94 tantrums a day and bursting into tears over everything from Peppa Pig ending to the lack of a decent supply of Smarties when they have a sugar craving.
We grown women also cry more than teenagers going through all the hormone overload and teenage angsty stuff. I’m pretty sure I spent most of my teenage years weeping about one thing or another in an overly dramatic fashion from the state of the environment to the demise of my favourite pop group. I almost had to be signed into Gransha when Bros split up and went into an official period of mourning for at least a week.
I think as many of us get older we find that we become more emotional. I’m certainly more prone to letting down my defences and having a good oul cry from time to time.
That blasted ad for SMA, for example, can have me weeping into my cup of tea while I don’t even try watching sad films any more after a very unfortunate incident following my viewing of ‘What Dreams May Come’ with my husband. I think I used up a few weeks worth of crying in that night alone and had a headache for two days afterwards.
Needless to say falling out with my partner (which nearly happened when I couldn’t pull myself together after watching ‘What Dreams May Come’) is upsetting – and it’s hardly surprising that the survey found people tend to cry over a bereavement. It’s hardly rocket science that either falling out with the person or people who mean most to you, or losing someone you love will have you reaching for the hankies. There are few people who can experience such things without letting their emotions out in a damn good cry.
I’m not surprised that ‘feeling tired’ ranks up there in the top five too. We all seem to be busier than ever before – even with the invention of labour saving devices – and there is a culture out there at the moment of keeping going even when you are sleep deprived, ill and feeling as if you are running on empty. I’m sure there isn’t a person reading this who hasn’t, at least one, had a ‘stop the world I want to get off’ moment and yes, I admit some of my most spectacular crying fits have been when I’ve been over tired. Those will generally be the times when I lose it all together and do one of those horrendous ugly cries where anything I try to say comes out as inaudible snorts and squeals and I’ll phone my mammy and cry on her shoulder. (The husband is still too traumatised by my previous big crying fit to cope with me on emotion over load any more).
What does surprise me, however, is how hearing other people’s bad news really can affect me in a way that it never used to. It isn’t a case that I used to be hard hearted but recently I find that it takes very little to have me sobbing. If I hear of someone losing their job, of someone trying to cope with a sick child or ailing parent, or if I just hear that someone else is finding life a little tough I do find myself more affected than ever before.
Bizarrely I can also find myself welling up at things which really, actually aren’t that sad at all. I remember vividly visiting the boy’s school for an induction meeting and looking around the big assembly hall, imagining my wee man there, and having to fight back the tears. He wasn’t with me and the headmaster was wittering on about the uniform code but something in my brain found this overly emotional and I had to take a few deep breaths to steady myself.
Thankfully I’m also more likely to shed happy tears this weather. There is nothing better than laughing til you cry or being so overwhelmed with love or admiration for someone that you get misty eyed. I’ve cried when friends have married, when they have had babies, when they have achieved their goals and dreams and some times just when I am sitting in a room with them having the craic and I realise that I’m very lucky to have those people in my life.
Crying is a healthy way to release our emotions and while I think no one other than women really get the concept of a “good cry” I’m glad that I don’t have to feel I should bottle up my emotions, be they positive or negative.
If that makes me a cry-baby, then I’ll happily wear my title with pride.

1 comment:

The wife of bold said...

Yep - that sure sounds like me, it's good to know i'm not the only one who cry's at the drop of a hat.

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