My so-called life

It's been hard to write about my life lately because nothing much has really happened.
Well, not much that is for public consumption anyway.
So I was thinking, if this was my dream life (and it's a nice life I have, by the way, just kind of uneventful) it would go something like this...

Hello darling reader, welcome to my blog post today.
I'm writing this from my day bed. Does that sound terribly glam? I hope so, because it is. Unfortunately it's a little too warm here today but thankfully George doesn't mind waving that big fan for me. He is such a darling!
Well, what to report? Can you believe it? The bidding war for my latest novel has reached epic proportions. They say there has never been anything like it before and there isn't likely to be anything like it again. One publishing house has told me "this is as near to perfection as it comes". I was a bit annoyed by the use of the word "near" but then opened another bottle of champers and forgot all about it.
George (Clooney, btw, in case you wondered) and I have chartered a private plane for later. We're off to meet with Brad and Ang and the twins. I'm going to be godmammy, isn't that delicious? I've ordered them a couple of cars and some diamonds for a welcome present. Not sure about the name Knox, but I'm sure it will grow on me.
When we're done with the babies, we're coming back to our island retreat. Westlife (don't mock!) are flying in later to perform a private concert and they have promised not to sing that Bye Bye Baby shite song. I'm going to join in for "Total Eclipse of the Heart" though - I've bought a big wig and everything. What fun!
Anyway, til tomorrow, stay classy.