Thursday, February 05, 2009

Baby Watch - 4 weeks and 4 days left...

Have you guessed what I'm doing yet?
First it was six weeks and six days, then five weeks and five days and now it's four weeks and four days to go.
How do I feel? Very emotional for a number of reasons. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't really, really scared of labour and delivery. I know I've done it before and lived to tell the tale but it didn't rank among my most favouritist experiences ever.
At the same time I am reaching the "Please God, can we just get it over with?" stage. I know it has to be done, so can we please just do it and get it over with and leave me and my stitches to heal in peace?
I'm also nesting - but not productively. Our spare room remains a spare room - just stacked with baby things. It is not the nursery of my dreams yet. And while I had thought that wouldn't bother me at all (given that madam will be with us in our room for the first 6 months anyway) i'm now getting irrationally irritated by it.
Her new cot remains in my parent's attic. My very gorgeous godson is still sleeping in her crib (and I feel like an evil landlord requesting it back just in case madam comes early).
If she were to arrive right now she would have nowhere to sleep.
Joseph has (mostly down to me, I have to say) taken to sleeping in our bed every night. I have that awful "my baby is going to have my divided attention soon and I want to drink him now" emotional wobbles. But "cross for own back" springs to mind, and DH has slumped to the spare room/ nursery in waiting for decent sleep - while I'm surprising welcoming the cuddles from an over eager five year old most nights.
I so want to be a mammy again - but so scared of getting it wrong again, of getting that nasty old PND and going super loopy.
So with four weeks and four days to go - it's fair to say the hormones have landed.
It's only going to get worse between now and the big day!

1 comment:

bfs ~ "Mimi" said...

Awwwww ... it's all going to fall in place (the birth, the nursery, all of that!).

I understand why you're soaking all of Joseph that you can. But you'll discover lots of those same lovely times with him will still be there.

When our 2nd came along, the newborn sent presents home every day to the 1st. So our little gal opened a gift from her baby brother every day until he came home from the hospital. They were just tiny gifts, but it sure made the transition easier. Made her feel very special, and very excited to be the "big" sister!

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